From Diner Bitch to Digital Dawg!

When I worked in coffee, I called myself a ‘Coffee Jockey.’  When I worked at a diner, I was a ‘Diner Bitch.’  Now, my co-worker and boss-type-

My Old Bitching Grounds

person calls me and our co-op student ‘Digital Dawgs.’  I like titles like this…’Cashier,’ ‘Server’ and ‘Digital Music Marketer’ are no fun, and also incorrect.

I wasn’t a ‘Cashier!’  I made complex coffees, brought food to tables, cleaned up, and hell…I managed!

I was never a ‘Server!’  If you’ve ever been to a diner, you know the waiters and waitresses are not like those you find at Jack Astors, Applebees, Cracker Barrel or whatever eatery you frequent.

And I’m not a marketer.  There are elements of artist development, of critique and analysis…being a salesman of culture.  I hate marketing.  I love my job…I’m a digital dawg!

Today I went to my old diner to see the old stomping ground (no need to hide it…it’s the Zellers Family Diner at Shoppers World Danforth in Toronto…drop in, say Roo sent you!) and noticed some vital differences between my old and my new job.

DINER: I was up on my feet for hours at a time, constantly moving…I was thirty pounds lighter, and maintained that simply by working!

DAWG: I’m…in my seat for hours at a time.  This is the one downside to my current job…it’s very much an inactive position.

DINER: I spent my day bouncing from person to person, dealing with a bunch of little jobs at a time, and then turning over and doing it again.

DAWG: I focus on larger projects and the individual pieces that make them up.  I may get ‘two’ things done in a day, but they’re big things.

DINER: The job is an endless cycle…the ‘peak’ is when you don’t even have to think about the codes for coffee or the most obscure meal and remember each tables order and who ordered what and their special orders like each order was a simple image in your head and the table was just a location on a map…*gasp* …that’s as good as it gets.

DAWG: The job is ‘actually’ a journey…like they say a career should be.  Learn new things every day…no day is like the last…creativity is what’s important, and creativity becomes turnover.

DINER: I leave the job every day with craploads of money in my pocket, and a small paycheque every two weeks.

DAWG: …I’m still an intern…I love those two sweet sweet guys who are covering my life until I that first paycheque.

DINER: Holy crap the politics!  Who’s side are you on?? Which minor issue is the more important than anything else in the world!! Who showed up late and then had the balls to complain about someone ELSE being late!  Why did you talk to her when you know SHE is in the running to get the management position!!

DAWG: Ruler ball.  Loud music.  Ridiculous joking.  Stopping everything to help someone because they might be in a shit-storm if you don’t.  “If you do well, I do well.”

Really…the benefit of being a Diner Bitch is cash in pocket and weight loss.  The benefit of being a Digital Dawg is…everything else you’d ever want and more.

Bark bark.

Do you have a crazy job experience, like going from Tour Guide to Lingerie Store manager or from Sex Shop to Restaurant Cook? (last one…true story…)  Tell me about it!  What were the crazy differences between the two positions?  Are you better off?


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3 Responses to “From Diner Bitch to Digital Dawg!”

  1. Witch Hill Says:

    I was a Substitute Teacher in Baltimore Maryland and after that I was the manager of a Porn Shop. The Upside to the change was it was less stressful. The downside was I hated telling people where i worked. In the long run it was a good change because very few people ever try and return anything to a porn shop, so I had next to no prolonged customer contact because people wanted to get in and get out.

    Now I’m a working musician and amateur recording engineer. Its about the same as working in a porn shop lol.

    • Roo Says:

      I love Baltimore! …though I guess my experience is entirely from a visit in 1997 and John Waters movies 😉

      Yah, I can see the comparison…you’re trying to help people have fun, they’re embarrassed to be there until they get to know you…or with recording you’re trying to inspire someone to bare their soul, they’d prefer not to stick around.

      Link me to music!!! Plz!!

  2. Witch Hill Says:

    i have a few rough demos up on my blog
    The One is a Pure Metal Track the other 2 are progressive, none of them are mastered yet.

    Baltimore is pretty great and John Waters is one of the great things about it. When I use to work down town in Fells Point you could catch him just walking around, he’ll talk to anyone even if it’s just an apology that he’s in a hurry.

    In Fact Look Closely at the Drive in Scene os Cecil B Demented and You Can See me as one of the 800 extras, Cry Baby was Filmed at My School, and a friend of mine lives on the street he covered in “marital toys” So it’s always funny to meet a Waters fan from out of state because he;s such a local fixture.

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